Everything is Super When You're...
by Kageri
Summary: A funny little skit with Heero x Duo and a little South Park diddy featuring everybody's favorite character, Big Gay Al.


"Bombs are flying, people are dying,

Everything's Super When You're…

__

"Bombs are flying, people are dying,  
Children are crying, politicians are lying too.  
Cancer is killing, Texaco's spilling.  
The whole world's gone to hell,   
But how are you?"  
  
Heero was covered in blood and lying on a white hospital bed. Duo held his hand tightly as Dr. J administered the strongest pain reliever he had. "Ano... did I happen to mention that this drug is highly..." J said, lowering his voice "...experimental."  
"Highly WHAT!?!?! W-what's the worst that could happen?!" Duo shrieked. Dr. J just shrugged, "Don't worry, it's effects won't damage him in the least, well not physically. And how much more messed up can his mind get?" Duo twirled his braid with his index finger, the doctor's words bringing him little comfort.   
He turned to Heero and asked, "Well, how are you?" Heero rubbed his head and smiled! This made Duo even more worried.  
"Oi, Heero?" Duo repeated. Heero just stared back at him smiling for a few seconds, then opened his mouth to reply.  
  
_"I'M SUPER! Thanks for asking! All things considered I couldn't be better I must say! I'm SUPER, no nothing bugs me. Everything is super when you're..."_  
  
Heero grabbed Duo's hat and positioned it on his own head.  
_"Don't you think I look cute in this hat?"_  
  
Duo, Trowa, Quatre and Wufei stared at the very genki and very vocal version of their companion. Then Duo glared at Dr. J.  
"This is only temporary, ne?"  
Dr J nodded, "Heero knows what's happening, he just can't control or stop it." All the pilots snickered at this thought, even Trowa. Heero was dancing around, clad only in a hospital gown and Duo's hat, singing at the top of his lungs, and he knew it.  
  
Heero retreated into his mind and thought, 'I'm singing, and they're watching. Does not compute.' However, he continued his song and dance around the ER.  
  
_"I'm so sorry, Mr. Cripple,  
But I just can't feel too bad for you right now!  
Because I'm feeling so insanely super,   
That even the fact that you can't walk can't bring me down!"_  
  
Heero wished he had a gun and partial control of his motor skills so he could shoot himself in the head. He was dancing around the room with a man who had recently had both legs amputated and was waiting for technological limb replacement surgery. He looked at the man now, he was smiling. And laughing? In fact, everyone had gotten into his song, the nurses had even made a chorus.  
  
_"He's super!!! Thanks for asking!  
All things considered he couldn't be better he must say!!!"_  
  
Heero, unwillingly and willingly, joined in their singing.  
  
_"I'M SUPER!!! No nothing bugs me!  
Everything is super when you're..., don't you think I look good in this hat,  
These little pants, this matching tie, I've got it all!"_  
  
That's when Heero realized he had NONE of the previous articles of clothing, with the exception of the fore-mentioned hat.  
  
Duo just glared at Heero's antics, while Trowa, Quatre and Wufei all fell to their knees in laughter.  
  
_"In the barracks and the trenches as well!"_ the nurses sang into their stethoscopes.   
  
_"Stick 'em up!"_ Heero shouted. Instead of running for cover like they'd normally do when Heero said those words, the three laughing pilots fell to the ground, struggling to breathe between laughs.  
  
_"Heero-kun says do as do tell!"_ the nurses chimed in.  
  
_"Skittles!!!"_ Heero screamed, then wondered, what the hell was THAT supposed to mean? He pondered his question for a few seconds then realization hits him like a ton of bricks. 'Oh no', he thought then remembered there was nothing he could do. Meanwhile, the chorus went on:  
  
_" Yes he's super and he's proud to prevay!"_  
  
Heero thought back to the 'Skittles' comment he had made before, and put 2 and 2 together, or should I say 1 and 2 His head said, 'No, NO!!!' but his mouth said:  
  
_"Okay!"_  
  
The chorus continued with his consent.  
  
_"Everything is super when you're GAY!!!!"_  
  
Heero managed to widen his eyes and mumble something like the word, "No."  
  
The chorus didn't hear him though and finished up by shouting,  
  
_"WHEN YOU'RE GAY!!!!!"_  
  
Luckily Trowa, Quatre and Wufei were in the ER; all of them had passed out from lack of oxygen. Duo just stood there, staring at Heero.  
"Oi, J, why did Heero choose to sing THAT song?" Duo asked, sweatdropping. J's face turned bright red.  
"Those are his deepest feelings and secrets."  
Duo smirked, "Reeeeally..."  
Heero's body stood there smiling like an idiot, demo, the boy inside was determined to go suicidal A.S.A.P. Then, Duo was the one to do something unexpected. He hooked his arms around Heero, and resting his hands on Heero's rear-end, gave him the most passionate kiss he had to give.  
"I've been waiting to do that for a LONG TIME." he said, blushing deeply. Heero's eyes widened once more. 'He... he reciprocates my feelings!' The pair headed to the bedroom, only to commence in the most vile, dirty and passionate sex ever experienced on Earth or the colonies.  
  
Duo traced his dainty fingers over his koibito's pale pink nipple and whispered to him, "Hee-chan, will you hate me after that super-morphine wears off?" Heero wrapped his hand in the chestnut locks and pressed Duo's lips to his own.  
"Baka, the pain reliever was gone hours ago." Heero said softly. Duo smiled as Heero's body rolled on top of his own. "Again?"  
"Why not?" Duo shrugged, "Seven's always been my lucky number."  
  
Owari! ^_^


End file.
